I’m lulling myself to sleep and decided randomly to play Brian Mcknight’s Marry Your Daughter. And now, I’m a crying mess. With all the hagulhol effect. Seriously, what is happening to me?
I’m not even getting married anytime soon. But this song triggered an emotional button and a memory box of my childhood days spent with him. Gaaah. I miss my dad. It made me realize a lot of things I did on my own because I don’t have a dad. I still feel sad that I wasn’t given enough time to be with him because I was 9 and he was 47 when he passed away, way too young if you ask me. I didn’t know how it feels like to be terrified of asking dad if I can go out in a date, to be scolded if I get home late, or drunk, or with a suitor dropping me off. All I know is that I borrowed a classmates’ dad in my COTC graduation. I remember that I cried over an indigenous parol project back in high school because I don’t have a father to do it for me. We weren’t allowed to buy materials so I was crying while cutting a piece of wood. I remember being scared of going to bed and worrying about my mom and my sisters’ security. I remember a lot of things I did on my own because he wasn’t there. I’m not blaming him nor HIM because after all, it’s all according to HIS plan. I was just wondering if I would be the same person that I am now if there’s a father who could have influenced the way I view life.
It’s been 17 years since we lost him, BUT it doesn’t get easier. I do not miss him everyday, but when I do, I feel like the 9 year old kid once more. I cry and cry until the head hurts badly so the missing will stop.
Nero del Nero 
Talagang may hagulgol effect on a Valentine’s eve?
Yeah, loser no? D: BTW, where have you been?
hindi naman. ok lang iyan. ako, heto. lagi nag-OT ti fight depression. hindi naglalabas and I’m limiting my activity in my social networking sites. Trying to blog din. click my name sa comment mo. nakalink doon first post ko. haha.